'I was having this awful nightmare that I was 32. And then I woke up and I was 23. So relieved. And then I woke up for real, and I was 32.' - Celine, Before Sunset

Sunday, June 03, 2012

Kareoke Nights: Unleashing The Diva In You

I am heading to a karaoke dinner reunion with my Engineering Choir pals this Friday. This inspired me to post my Top 5 All-time competition pieces for such evenings. I must remind everyone that this list requires at least 30 minutes of vocalization prior to start of engagement and should be sung in the order as listed below. These songs are only to be sung once per night as not to embolden neighboring parties to press charges or seek legal countermeasures.

5) I Still Believe - Mariah Carey

A slow burner. A good way to ease in the crowd. Remember to bend forward and growl at the... 'No! No-no-no-no-no-I... need you baby!'

4) Through The Fire - Nina

Now that you got everybody's attention, it's time to show them your unnatural range and nostril control with this 'buwis-buhay' song from Nina. Finish them off with the 'makatindig-balahibo, pamatay-kuto' of a head note at the end.... 'Yeah, baby.... Through The Fireeeee!!!!!' Flame On! Phoenix Force!

3) Alone - Heart

Let's dim the lights and turn on the smoke machine, the crowd is in for a treat. Hand a second mic to one of your biggest fans (or yung kanta ng kanta ng kasabay mo nung first 2 songs.. di ka tuloy maka-moment). Have this fan sing the second voice to this 80's classic. Hand gestures when performing this song is a must.

2) Superwoman - Gladys Knight, Patti LaBelle and Dionne Warwick

Find any version of Superwoman in the playlist and do all three singers on the video below. Leave your audience awe-struck with your vocal variety and control. Make sure to look at their faces as your do the blending by yourself in the end. Amazeballs.

1) Better Days - Dianne Reeves

This song is the only way to close the night. Caution. This song has also ended the lives of a few diva wannabes unprepared to take on this aneurysm-inducing gargantuan of a hit by Dianne Reeves. This song has been used in a few exorcisms as it is known to dispel evil entities and spirits when sung properly. Best sung intoxicated.

Monday, April 23, 2012

The Mental Break

One of the downsides of living in today's interconnected world is never really being able to switch off. You are constantly reminded of your unfortunate and miserable life by means of texts from your boss asking you to come in on a Saturday, tweets from your ex sharing how she's so happy in her current relationship and Four Square check-ins by your frenemy currently touring Europe.

Sometimes, we just would like to get away from it all. A bullet through the head might seem like the best solution at times. But most days, we can only afford a mental break.

A weekend - An Overnight Stay in some Relaxing Hotel / Resort

DealGrocer.com & CashCashPinoy.com has made thousands last year selling deals online for these. Grab your special someone or a special someone just for a weekend and head off to the beach or the hills. Roll around comfortable sheets. Wear that nice bikini you never had the chance to wear. For a more relaxing experience, have that special someone plan everything and do the driving. It will just be an eat, sleep, be happy weekend.

A day - The Day Spa

A lot of these have been popping up around the metro. All of them cater their own special formula for body relaxation and detoxification. Get yourself scrubbed, oiled and manhandled by seasoned professionals who just know the right places to knead and scour. You will be a renewed man when you exit their doors - ready for a good night sleep.

4 hours - Movie / Concert / Play

Looking forward to a nice movie, concert or play can occupy your afternoon like news of a popular teenage heartthrob in a sex scandal. It will be best to plan around it. Have lunch before and maybe coffee after. Empty your mind and, for an afternoon, let someone else perform instead of you.

2 hours - Gym / Sports

Focus for two hours by lifting weights, attending a dance class, hitting balls or running. Sweat out stress and negativity. Raising your heart rate for 20 minutes a day makes your body release endorphins. And endorphins make your happy. So say Legally Blonde.

1 hour - Drive to a Happy Place

One should never be too far from a happy place. For most people, it is their bed. Some, a quiet bench in the park. For me, Hooters. When I feel like doing some carefree, mind numbing binge eating.. Hooters is where I go. But lately, with traffic, I end up just stopping by the nearest Serenitea.

30 minutes - Episodic TV

Not necessarily watching through the standard means. Studies say, most young adults now watch more TV on their PCs than standard television units. Who can blame them, it is more convenient to do so now with fast internet connection allowing them to stream episodes directly from the web. For the purposes of relaxation, I suggest comedies. For escapism, fantasy or sci-fi drama.

15 minutes - Cigarette Break

Tag along a buddy. Chit chat. Blow off steam (or smoke).

5 minutes - 9gag.com

A must in everyone's alt-tab.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Things I picked up from being away from home...

Being away from home has some advantages. It gets you away from your usual comforts and it breaks your regular routine. I found a few interesting things during my stay here in KL. Let me share you some...

1) 1 month of listening to Florence + The Machine made me wanna watch them live now.

2) Yup, you will grow to like Soya Milk when in Malaysia. I gulp per 3 tablespoons of spicy curry.

3) There is no quick way to Melt Away Stress but... this was close enough for me.

4) Lipo 6 is not legal in KL. Had to use Hydroxycut.

5) WhatsApp. Install it. Got me connected to a good number of people.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Do you really need all of these?

For us to stay in budget and not ending up with stacks of junk at home, I have summarized some key mind tricks and tips on when to pass and not buy stuff:

1) You are always in a diet!

You do not need the excuse of being overweight to start eating healthy (normally less). Pass on the soda and fries. Just keep the burger. I don't care if the happy meal will get you the latest Twilight mug. We spend for food at least thrice a day. Cutting back here will help your wallet and your thighs in the long run.

2) Just because it's new doesn't mean you need to have it!

It is only nice and shiny in the first 2 weeks. After which, the credit card bill arrives. iPad 2, Galaxy S2, Blackberry Bold 9900. You know they put the numbers in there to tell you that you will only have the latest until the next one comes along, right? Wait a month or two before buying really new stuff. You and the prices would probably be more reasonable.

3) Do you really need another?

Another bag, another pair of shoes... Practicality dictates 'Do not replace if it is not broken.' Fashion suggests 'Beauty should be timeless.' With this, we should then go for pieces that are durable and would go with anything. If all else fails... Here's a good formula to live by:

Underwear > Socks > Shirts > Jeans > Shoes > Jackets > Bags > Belts > Hats > Girlfriends

4) Life is a sit-down meal, not a buffet!

Much like a sit-down meal, you need to decide carefully what you want in buying stuff. It is not practical spending to get everything and ending up just liking/finishing 1 or 2 of what is served. Buy one. Finish it. Spend time with it. If you need more, then buy again. You are not a collector. You don't have taste.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

The North Station

Untitled, originally uploaded by audiOscience!.

Being stationed in the north has it's share of pros and cons. Let me break them down.


1. Trinoma & SM North EDSA - An MRT station away. They will be the new Shang and Megamall.
2. Tomas Morato - The new Metrowalk slash City Golf
3. MRT - Park anywhere in the other stations and head to work via train. Convenience, yes.
4. Close to UP & Ateneo. - Masterals and boarding options
5. ABS-CBN & GMA are across the street - My dream to break into the industry is a stone throw away.


1. EDSA is unavoidable - You get everything that comes with it. Busses, pollution, noise and... yes... masa juice.
2. Everybody else is somewhere south - Do you know anyone who works north of Ortigas? That's right.... me too.
3. No Chicken Wings within a 15 mile radius - Will need to travel a bit to get to a decent wing place. Bye bye Charlies & Hooters.
4. Where will our visitors stay? - Eurotel? Sogo? Well... I guess if it's that short of a visit then...
5. It is as north as north goes - Just to put things in perspective, let's say you live in Muntinlupa, Parañaque or Las Pinas. You'll probably have better luck getting to Tagaytay in 1 hour.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Everything is so Random (part deux)

I got a random phone call this afternoon from a Singapore number. Prepared to be dragged into an escalation call, I answered just to be greeted by that wh*r8 b!t@h Danuel (love him to bits). He was asking for some random video that I showed him sometime a few years back. It was just so random...

Monday, June 27, 2011

A Life Less Ordinary

Sleeping cat, originally uploaded by Dr. Hemmert.

I sometimes wish I had the life of a cat. Domesticated, collared, groomed and well-fed. I get to sleep the afternoons away. Chase everything shiny and smaller than I am. Be lazy.

I'd climb up trees and watch cars go by. I'd hiss and air-claw the neighbor's cowardly dog. I'd occasionally swipe at goldfish in the pond. I'd show my master trophies of dead birds and insects I'll sneak indoors.

I'd look outside the window and wish the rain away. I'd hang up the curtains and tumble onto the sofa below. I'd run up and down the stairs just because I can. I'd ignore every other guest that my master brings home.

I'd sometimes look into my master's weary eyes. I'd wonder what happened during his day. I'd meow and ask why he seems lonely at times. I'd ponder why he's been in bed all day.

I'd do stupid acrobatics to just get a laugh. I'd stretch and lie on his face when he doesn't want to get up. I'd do this for I suffer the expectations of being an ordinary. He suffers this for being a lonely man with a cat.